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Tips For A Healthy Divorce
Divorce is not an easy process. Even if you have only been married a short time, dissolving a union can be as difficult financially and socially as it is emotionally. Having a knowledgeable divorce attorney in your corner can help to ease the difficult process'and it is imperative that you begin working with the attorney as soon as you begin to consider getting divorced or as soon as you hear your spouse is. There are also several other things you can do, according to The Huffington Post, to make the divorce easier.
The first, according to The Huffington Post, is to realize that your marriage is a 'sunk cost. In economic terms, a sunk cost is a failed investment that cannot, under any circumstances, be salvaged. Human nature is apt to want to fix or solve things, rather than let them go, which is why, The Huffington Post notes, we may spend thousands of dollars attempting to fix a lemon of a car rather than giving up and trading it in. Recognizing that your marriage is over can help you save you time and money, and help you to emotionally move on.
How Much Does Raising a Child Cost?
According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, it will cost $241,080 to raise and provide for a child until he or she is 18 years old. However, this does not include college tuition - which could almost double the amount.
The most expensive items in'raising a child include housing, as well as child care and food expenses. In fact, child care and education expenses account for nearly twenty percent of child raising costs.'The USDA also notes that more and more families have both parents working - something that used to be a luxury but is now a necessity.
Sexless Marriage is Grounds for Divorce
According to The New York Times, men and women who are married have sex an average of 58 times a year, just over more than once a week. These statistics, of course, are varied''married people under 30 have sex about 111 times a year.
And it's estimated that about 15 percent of married couples have not had sex with their spouse in the last six months to one year,' reports the Times. Despite these numbers, a common phenomenon in marriage is the waning of sexual interest in one's partner. This can often lead to a sexless marriage'which in turn can lead to divorce.
A sexless marriage is not one in which the couple is merely not being consistently intimate, but rather one in which repeated sexual advances are ignored and the couple experiences a long period without any intimate activity at all.
Safety in an Abusive Relationship
Sometimes people in abusive relationships think that the relationship will get better or they don't think they can leave. Whatever the reason may be, there are many people suffering from domestic abuse and they need to know how to keep themselves safe in the relationship and even if they choose to leave.
DomesticViolence.org offers tips to domestic abuse victims to stay safe.
If you are in a relationship with abuse, but you do not want to or you feel you cannot leave:
- Have important phone numbers available for you and your children such as an abuse hotline, a shelter, the police, and friends;
- Tell nearby friends about the abuse so they can call the police if they hear anything suspicious in your home. A code word can also be used to notify them;
Paternity Questions in Illinois
Having and raising a child is no easy task, especially if you are a single parent, and it can be even more challenging when you are unsure of who the child's father is. A simple solution to this problem is paternity tests, of which there are many different options to choose from.
This depends very much on what type of test is taken. Tests that are administered before the birth of the child are often more expensive because of the additional hospital and doctor fees. The price can range anywhere from $400 to $2,000.
Divorce Parties Gaining in Popularity
The stigma surrounding divorce has waned as divorce as become more common. By some estimates, 50 percent of all American marriages end in divorce. The collapse of a marriage is even more likely, according to The Nation, in ultra-conservative states and states with higher conservative Christian populations. Two researchers from the University of Iowa told The Nation that this was in part because conservative religious beliefs and the social norms surrounding them 'decrease marital stability through the promotion of practices that increase divorce risk. An example of this could be the secondary status of women.
Bearing in mind that religion'which at one time may have encouraged couples to stay together even in a less-than-perfect relationship'may now increase the chance of divorce, it may come as no surprise that the stigma surrounding divorce is no longer a major factor. In fact, divorce parties, according to a recent Fox News article, 'are all the rage. In Las Vegas, divorce parties have hit new heights of popularity. Glynda Rhodes is a high-end divorce party-planner in Vegas. She told Fox that, 'if they want to burn their dress, or if they want to go to the spa'everybody has a different way they want to release.'
How to Find Safety in an Abusive Relationship
If you or a loved one are in an abusive relationship and do not know where to turn or how to get out, remember that you are not alone. The best way to find safety is to leave the abuser, but sometimes this is not easy to do, especially if the abused person is financially dependent on their abuser.
If you're married, divorce can take time. Your abuser, whether he or she was your spouse or not can still find you. After getting away safely, you should seek an 0rder of protection, which legally restricts your abuser from being near you, locations you frequent such as your home or workplace, and from contacting you.
Other tips from DomesticViolence.org to find safety include the following:
- Get help from family and friends: They may be able to help get you out of a bad situation and get the legal or medical help that you need;
Pet Custody During Divorce
For many couples who opt not to have children, a pet is considered a 'fur child. Unfortunately, according to the Huffington Post, 'the law would not agree. Joyce Tischler, director of litigation for the Animal Legal Defense Fund told the Huffington Post that, 'in the eyes of the law, they are really no different than the silverware, the cars, the home. This makes for some serious arguments during divorce when there is a shared pet, which, according to the Huffington Post, is more and more likely. 'Sixty-three percent'71.1 million'of U.S. households own pets, according to the latest National Pet Owners Survey. The bulk of those animals are dogs'about 44 million,' the Huffington Post reports.
Caring for these pets is big business, too. Americans are estimated to spend roughly $40 billion every year on pet care, up dramatically from an average of $24 billion in 1994. This is not only indicative of the rising popularity of luxury pet items, but also of American attitudes. 'More couples have fewer children than a generation or two ago and view their pet as their kids or companions,' reports the Huffington Post, 'owners pay $2,000 for an orthopedist to reconstruct a dog's knee' high-end pet stores sell rhinestone-studded dog collars, peanut butter biscotti instead of run-of-the-mill dog treats.'
Divorce Less Common for Lower Income Families
If you are considering divorce in Kane County, your best bet is to seek the counsel of a qualified attorney from Van A. Larson, P.C. We believe that all family law cases have reasonable solutions if sought, and we fight tirelessly to deliver the best possible results for our clients. Despite the high divorce rate in the U.S.'approximately half of all marriages end in divorce'some people consider divorce an option only for the wealthy. According to US News and World Report, 'job insecurity and uncertainty about the future may be a key part of what's keeping many working-class Americans from getting or staying married. A new study from the Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore found that there's a class divide when it comes to divorce.
Optimism About Marriage Can Have Negative Effects
When two people get married there is always a sense of optimism. Everyone hopes that they will be together forever, especially the couple themselves. But a new study released recently shows that this optimism may not be good for the marriage. Hoping for too much happiness might end up in disappointment and even divorce.
The study was published in the Journal of Family Psychology in June 2013. The researchers, Justin A. Layner, Benjamin R. Karney, and Thomas N. Bradbury examined the effects of optimism have on the wives during their marriages. Over the course of four years, more than 250 couples were followed and surveyed about the happiness of their marriage.
If women in the marriage had high expectations, their optimism was rewarded with grief. The researchers wrote in their study that 'wives who predicted the greatest increases in satisfaction actually had the greatest declines in satisfaction.'' The negative effects included worse self-esteem, greater feelings of aggression towards their husbands and a worse reaction to stress in their lives. The negative effects were less in wives who had a more moderate view of their marriage.