Divorce can be a challenging period of life for all parties involved. This can be compounded if the couple filing shares underage children. Though it can be easy to get swept up in your emotions and remain distracted by all the legal proceedings and unexpected life changes, it is imperative to continue to give extra support and attention to your children during divorce. Van Larson Law focuses on navigating you through your divorce in the most effective and stress-free manner. A significant aspect of that is providing you with the resources available to help your children during the transition.  

Five Tips for Helping Children Adjust During Divorce

During a divorce, children undergo many changes very rapidly. These changes in a child’s life can result in adverse childhood experiences. Adverse childhood experiences, or ACEs, can be traced to be the root of many challenging health and social problems later in life. A parent’s need to provide for and protect their children always comes as a top priority, but it can be difficult for one person to juggle all of the changes in their own life while giving the proper attention and support to their children. It could also be uncharted territory for the parent and they may be unsure of how to navigate the shift in their daily routine.  

Fortunately, there are many ways in which a parent can ensure their child is given the fairest treatment and attention during the divorce. Some points to consider when making parental arrangements include:

Illinois couples frequently get divorced because they struggle to communicate productively. Unfortunately, communication between high-conflict couples does not always get better once a divorce is finalized. But when a couple shares children, effective communication continues to be essential for many years to come as parents navigate the daily hurdles of school, extracurricular activities, healthcare, and more. If you are going through a divorce and hoping to maintain healthy communication habits throughout your co-parenting experience, here are some tips from divorce experts that may help.

Communicate in Writing Whenever Possible

Avoiding in-person discussions, including phone calls, helps many high-conflict couples avoid situations that can quickly escalate. Divorced spouses tend to be quite good at pushing each other’s buttons and in-person communication allows couples to easily fall into old communication patterns that involve contempt, sarcasm, or dismissiveness. Instead, experts suggest communicating only in writing. Email is the best option for this because it is less urgent than text messaging and allows both parties time to cool off between responses. It also allows both parties to keep each other’s messages, which can make everybody think more carefully about what they say.

Set Firm Boundaries

If you say that you will only communicate via email, stick to that at the beginning of your divorce and never waver unless absolutely necessary. Perhaps many months or years down the road, when some time has passed and the feelings of anger or hurt are no longer as strong, you can relax these boundaries. However, setting firm boundaries early on will make them easier to abide by later. And, of course, when your ex sets boundaries, do your best to respect them.