Positive Co-Parenting Following an Illinois Divorce
As a new year rolls in, many of us are looking to start the year fresh and better ourselves during 2023. Though working on yourself is always a positive thing, it can be difficult for those of us who have recently gone through a divorce. If you and your former spouse have children together, it can be especially challenging to remain positive and resilient in the new year. But with some patience and understanding, you and your former spouse can work on your relationship in a constructive manner for the benefit of your children.
How Can I Keep Positive?
Though it may go against your instincts to talk positively towards and about your former spouse, this will have a large impact on your child’s view of the parent. Young children are highly impressionable and what you say has a big influence on how they will feel and act in the future. Illinois Courts tend to lean in favor of keeping both parents involved in children’s lives as much as possible.
The focus of the relationship with your former spouse should be your child and not the differences, arguments, or grudges you may hold against one another. Seeing you trying to make a genuine attempt at civility will hopefully be reciprocated by the other parent. If this is not the case, however, do not be discouraged. Just try and remember that you are being the bigger person and stay resilient for your child.
What if Our Parenting Plan is Not Working?
Perhaps the plan you and the other parent decided upon is not necessarily the best for everyone. A parenting plan can be modified under certain circumstances. Listening to the other parent and making sure you are being heard is pivotal for a plan to work. A few things to keep in mind when reevaluating a plan are:
- Make sure you both are in agreement on schedules in both homes. Your child’s life has been disrupted as much as yours and will adjust better if both homes function similarly.
- Reestablish which parent will be handling specific responsibilities. If you are the primary caretaker and handling all the responsibilities of the child, but are struggling, consider asking the other parent if there are activities and appointments they could take over.
- The court will make its decision on a parenting plan based on what it sees as the best for the child.
- If you and your former spouse still cannot agree on a plan together, further mediation can be a viable option.
Contact a Kane County Lawyer
Though it may be difficult to keep in mind at all times, it is important to stay positive. Reach out to an experienced Batavia, IL family law attorney at Van Larson Law, P.C. for a free consultation to discuss what the best options are for you and your family. Call 630-879-9090 today!
Sources:
https://www.ilga.gov/legislation/102/HR/10200HR0004enr.htm
https://www.isba.org/public/guide/gettingadivorce
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